Saturday, April 29, 2006

Deluded, Dizzy and Deliriously Amused

My boy (upon seeing a picture of Heather Locklear on some stupid gossip site I was visiting): Mommy, is that you?

Me: Why, yes, honey, it is!

My boy: You look nice and pretty on there.

Me: Thank you, sweet boy.

I probably should make it clear right here, right now, that I look nothing like Ms. Locklear -- we do have the blonde hair going on, though. Oh, and the dazzling, laser-bleached smile -- got that in common as well. And now that I think about it, the delicate, doll-like features are quite similar in the two of us. Also, the banging, smoking-hot, perhaps a bit on the anorexic side bods. The amazing legs. The luminous, spot-free skin…

Wow. I didn't realize it till now, but we’re practically twins! Lar’s a lucky, lucky man.

11 Comments:

At 11:08 AM, Blogger Katie said...

And also, neither of you have changed a lick since the 80s! You should go try to pull a fast one on David Spade. Or whoever she's dating right now.

P.S. Lar is lucky!

 
At 11:52 AM, Blogger Ms. Lori said...

Tee hee. Thanks, Katie. Yes, it's sad that I still sport a mullet. (gag) Spade might dig it, though. Lordallmighty, I hope the sarcasm comes across in my post, otherwise, I'm apt to receive many mean comments about what an egotistical skank I am. ;-)

 
At 2:21 PM, Blogger Redneck Nerdboy! said...

Lar's a lucky man, and you, my dear, have just made all the men who read your blog drop a notch or two in despair for having not woo'ed you before he did!

Dammit.

 
At 6:38 PM, Blogger Ellen said...

This is why we have children.
xoxoxo

 
At 9:27 AM, Blogger Ms. Lori said...

Jas, you're very kind, but keep in mind, I resemble Locklear about as much as Ann Coulter does. ;-)

Indeed, Ms. Meister. They're cool little things, aren't they?

 
At 9:43 AM, Blogger David Niall Wilson said...

I think, rather than mean comments you are more likely to attract all sorts of Internet predators (lol). Kids do say the right thing sometimes to make life a bit more worthwhile.

D

 
At 2:02 PM, Blogger Redneck Nerdboy! said...

...don't shatter my image of you! I like you this way...


:)

 
At 2:47 PM, Blogger David Niall Wilson said...

This is downright weird. I posted a second time here, and it was THERE -- I saw it -- ??

Weird....very very weird (lol).

Back to Heather-Lori Locklearyoung....

 
At 2:17 AM, Blogger J. Stephen Reid said...

I'll bet you could get Spade, if you wanted him. He'd be allured by your sarcasm, then you could crush his tiny heart and escape with half his fortune from Joe Dirt.

 
At 4:19 AM, Blogger Alice said...

Lar IS a lucky, lucky man. Not only is his wife Hot and an almost-twin of Locklear, but is also amazing in millions of other ways too.

Got to disagree with ellen though: I swear the reason people have children is a subconscious need to be 'earthed' by brutal honesty every now and again. fter all, for every "mommy, you're pretty" comment you may get, there are a thousand more "gee, mommy, your arse is HUGE" or "mommy, did you know that your tummy wobbles when you walk?" or "mommy, you have a mustache” or “wow, mommy, why do you have so many wrinkles?” comments just waiting in the wings...

 
At 10:11 AM, Blogger Ms. Lori said...

David, the poor sods have already come a-looking for some Locklear. Sorry to disappoint the sods.

Jas, I *do* look quite a bit like a younger Debbie Harry with some Tracey Ullman thrown in for good measure -- does that help the image any? ;-)

Joshie, thanks! I like Spade, actually. Like his money even more, Joe Dirt or not.

Alice, yes, I do so enjoy it when they point out every zit and each facial hair. Keeps me off my high horse, I suppose. ;-)

 

Post a Comment

<< Home