Saturday, June 30, 2007

Toledo?

Well, it was bound to happen...I lost my mind this morning.

Was just a matter of time. A matter of two long months of extreme mental anguish, stress, lack of sleep, screaming children 24/7, premenopause, and Lar buying vanilla frosting instead of dark chocolate -- LIKE I EXPRESSLY WROTE ON THE SONOFABITCHING SHOPPING LIST!

One cannot put vanilla frosting on a white cake. Should never be done, not ever.

One cannot expect a human being to gracefully endure all that I have lately without some sort of repercussions. I am not a robot, despite my stolid exterior. I have tried to hold it together, truly I have. But my God, VANILLA FROSTING???

I believe with all my heart that Lar deserved to be threatened with a cup of Kid's Kitchen Macaroni & Cheese.

Yes, you read that correctly -- I raised the cup of Kid's Kitchen Macaroni & Cheese and threatened to smash it on his head.

I also screamed at the top of my lungs and hurled toilet paper about the kitchen.

Then I shrieked the following:

WHY DON'T YOU TAKE THE KIDS AND GO TO TOLEDO!

I admit, that was shameful.

I hang my head in shame.

7 Comments:

At 8:07 PM, Blogger Carol said...

I'm not sure why Toledo. But the basic idea seems sound. Maybe just take the kids and go elsewhere? Anywhere?

 
At 1:18 AM, Blogger Rabbitch said...

Why do you have toilet paper in the kitchen? Or do I just not want to know?

 
At 6:26 PM, Blogger anthropositor said...

Just a word of encouragement Toledo.

None of us goes into parenting with any experience. If we really knew what we were in for, a lot less of us would have done it.

Still, most of us manage not to kill the little tykes, and after a very short time (about twenty-five years) we are extremely glad that we did it (usually).

 
At 11:37 AM, Blogger kirby said...

What is it about a shopping list that turns some men into illiterate dolts?

 
At 11:43 AM, Blogger Ms. Lori said...

Carol, see my new post! HA! No kids, man.

Rabbitch, I was putting away groceries. Ay carumba!

Anthropositor, I appreciate that. Thanks. Actually, I'm pretty damned happy with my brood -- well, except when I'm not. ;-)

Kirby, lists require reading. 'Nuff said.

 
At 3:46 PM, Anonymous gerry rosser said...

Toledo, Ohio, or the one in Spain (or some other decadent European country)?

Now, about the white-on-white thing. Here's my thinking: it's frosting, it's cake. Now I admit I am not an expert in the field of aesthetics, but if I'm getting tasty sugary treats, color is irrelevant (or is that immaterial?). I may be a friggin' Philistine, but I pretty much feel the same about car color, and, to some extent (god help me) clothing.

 
At 12:13 PM, Blogger anthropositor said...

So glad you are feeling better dear. A droll sense of humor is such a help with family life.

 

Post a Comment

<< Home