Bah, Humbug!Yeah, that's right, bitches, I'm the Scrooge of Thanksgiving. And, as per usual, I'm expecting three visitors tonight, which is why I'm now drinking heavily in anticipation.
That one ghost with the chains scares me most of all, but he is the most necessary of the three. He looks like Bill O'Reilly, only with dreadlocks, and he forces me to eat suspicious-smelling pie while regaling me with stories about his penis, Frankie Joe. It's highly entertaining psychological horror at its best, and it teaches me a lesson about how I should appreciate my good fortune, my family and health. I always but always give thanks -- sincerely give thanks -- after he visits.
Excellent. Now that the obligatory Thanksgiving talk is out of the way, I must now order you to go forth and read this.
My lovely soul sister, O, be the author, and this little flash kicked my Scroogy ass.
Go and show her some love, why don't you?