Saturday, September 17, 2005

Breakfast With the Betty



Burger King's got itself a new mascot, and I for one am very happy to see The King go by the wayside. America most certainly does not need another religious symbol representing our country; especially considering we've alienated ourselves from most other nations due to our odd allegiance to Satan.

It is so refreshing to see a corporation portray themselves in an honest way. It is good and right that America drop her sparkly costume of superiority, her girdle of deceit, to reveal her true nature. Yes, America is great, and she is mighty, but she is also a very fat lady who is tired, hot and cranky these days. And being that she has become something of a strange science fictional hybrid of democratic-corporate rule, I think it fitting, almost endearing, that Burger King's new mascot is a candid confession, a cheeky, self-deprecating acknowledgement designed to soften the image of American ideology in the hopes that the rest of the world will laugh with us, not at us, will once again embrace us for the down-to-earth, delightful folks we really are.

Wouldn’t that just be delicious?

8 Comments:

At 4:17 PM, Anonymous Jeni said...

OMG, who uses their boob cleavage as a cup holder? Of course I personally don't have enough to hold even a sippee cup but damnnnn....

 
At 5:06 PM, Blogger W. Olivia said...

Thank you, Ms. Lori. I have once again snorted coffee through my nose and it's all your fault...

 
At 6:29 PM, Blogger Nick James said...

Oh man, that is an image to treasure. Are all women in your America that beautiful?

 
At 9:27 AM, Blogger Ms. Lori said...

HaHa! Ms. Betty is a resourceful woman with a hefty amount of, er, resources.

Ms. Olivia, glad to oblige, dolly.

Nick, yes, the women in my America are quite lovely, as you can see, but not all possess Ms. Betty's abundant charms.

 
At 9:50 AM, Blogger Cassandra said...

You kill me Ms. Lori!

 
At 12:10 AM, Blogger Cassandra said...

Ms. Lori- Sorry to go off subject, but i got my mom to start her own blog. She likes yours, so when i was tricking hers out, i put you on her blogroll. check it out if you want, just wanted to let you know she links to you.
http://cindysmidlifecrisis.blogspot.com
if you do go, could you leave her a comment if you are so inclined? it would make her dauy to have her first comment that isn't spam.
thankx!

 
At 6:55 AM, Blogger Ms. Lori said...

You got it, Cassandra! And thanks for introducing me to your mom!

 
At 9:10 AM, Blogger Cassandra said...

Thanks for visiting my mom!

 

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