Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Uncle. I'm Crying Uncle, Cruel Universe...

I've had enough. You win, Universe. You win.

Just got word that my mother's leukemia is back and worse than ever.

Doctors told her she's got a year, but only if they start her on a last resort treatment, which will make her feel incredibly ill.

She asked me, "Lori, should I do this? Is it worth it?"

I didn't know what to say.

ADDENDUM: Spoke to her oncologist just now -- my mother only has six to eight weeks if they don't begin the treatment. I think I know what to say now.

20 Comments:

At 12:52 PM, Anonymous aphid said...

I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I can't do anything to make you feel better, unless you have some suggestions. Reading about most people's "problems" makes me want to slap them for bitching and whining, but you've got REAL problems, and reading this post makes me want to drive all the way to wherever you are just to give you a hug. The fact that you still post at all, and that you're not asking for pity, makes you stronger than me, if that means anything. I offer you this small box of baby sloths in the hopes that things will get better.

 
At 1:36 PM, Blogger Ms. Lori said...

Baby sloths!!! Adorable.

Well, come on over here and gimme that hug, then. I could sure use one right about now.

The Internet, sad as this may seem, is really the only source of comfort I have.

 
At 2:53 PM, Blogger PICAdrienne said...

I have been asked that question. Not an actual family member, but someone I had known, my family had known, since I was a toddler. She had a toddler of her own at the time. The question really sucks and I am so sorry. No one should hear that question.

I don't know you, but would wrap my arms around you for a hug if I could.

 
At 3:33 PM, Anonymous Yvonne said...

Oh Lordy, to have lost your best friend and have to face losing your mother... I'm so, so sorry. Nobody should have to deal with that, ever. I wish I could post you a beer but I think the posties would steal it.

I'll be thinking about you. I wish I could do more.

 
At 4:54 PM, Anonymous lisa said...

i'm sorry to hear about your mother, i just lost my mother in August, but i can say this - stay strong for yourself and for your mother because in the end she will be okay.

 
At 6:35 PM, Blogger Jeanne said...

I'm so sorry. I was there last July (2006). Mother passed Sept 30, 2006. It sucks more than words can say and I wish I had something more profound to tell you but I don't. I'm aching for you and your Mom.

 
At 9:17 PM, Blogger Alexis Slaybaugh Willard said...

I love you Ms.Lori x x x hug x x x

 
At 5:58 AM, Anonymous aphid said...

I forget where you live, but if you're more than three hours away from Strafford, NH, it's unlikely I could get up there. I don't have a driver's license yet -- I can barely even pull the car out of the driveway. I'd have to get Mom to drive me and she's got alot of stuff to do . . . I wish I could.

Here's another silly picture. I've been stockpiling them lately. I know it's no substitute for a hug, but it's something.

 
At 6:20 AM, Blogger Rabbitch said...

Dude, I'm so sorry. I don't even know what to say.

I don't have any baby sloths to offer you but I can mail you a rat if you'd like -- I have one to spare.

 
At 6:29 AM, Anonymous janine said...

Oh hell - Sometimes the universe sucks :-( We went through this a couple of years ago with my FIL. He was diagnosed with lung cancer on Christmas Eve! (a great Cheistmas that was) He was told that the cancer was inoperable and too far advanced to be cured. He opted for Chemo - more I think for our sakes than his - knowing that it would do no real good. HE was gone by April....
We still miss him and probably always will. I wish I could do something to help - sending virtual hugs

 
At 2:03 PM, Blogger Redneck Nerdboy! said...

HOLY...???

Getting down on my knees to pray this time. Need lots of power....

 
At 3:07 PM, Blogger kirby said...

I'm sorry to hear your sad news.

 
At 4:17 PM, Blogger Justice said...

Shit, Ms. Lori. Just shit.

 
At 8:30 PM, Anonymous kim playfair said...

Lor, I Love You, I am so so sorry for your loss of Nici and for your mom's declining health. I would do anything to take away your despair honey. I am only a few miles away from you so please don't forget that you have a friend right over here.

 
At 4:18 AM, Blogger Patri Ann said...

fuck word. alot.

 
At 1:42 PM, Blogger RobinSlick said...

Oh fuck, Lori, I swung by here to see how you were doing after last week and now this?

Damn it this sucks. I don't know what else to say other than I'm so, so sorry.

xo

 
At 10:17 AM, Anonymous gerry rosser said...

I sat by my mother's hospital bed for about three months, she was on a respirator, unlikely to ever be in any other condition. Various downturns kept happening.
We (my siblings and I) had to make a decision. I was the only one there when the inevitable happened after the respirator was removed.
I can offer empathy, and little else.

 
At 10:39 AM, Blogger leenie71689 said...

Buttercup!! You are in a terrible spot these days:( I actually wrote u something on your post entitled Nic...but somehow it never made it. Anyways. I'm sorry for your loss...and your mother's terrible illness. I adore you and admire you and know you will come through this in time...unfortunatly a bit battered and bruised but nonetheless resilient. Love you!!! XXOO-Buttercup

 
At 3:48 PM, Blogger Amanda said...

I am so very, very sorry.

 
At 2:53 AM, Blogger Granny said...

Oh Lori, I'm so sorry. I've been where you are now.

I know what you mean about the internet. People I've never met have been there with virtual hugs and encouragement.

We seem to know each other even though we don't if that makes any sense.

I'll hold you in my thoughts.

 

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