Well, I'm a Bit Dizzy, but Otherwise Okay
Approximately twenty-five minutes ago, I received a rejection letter from some folks I really respect -- editors that have published me before. I sent them dreck, and I should've known better than to assault these fine publishers with a plate of steaming baboon genitals instead of something worthy of their time, something, oh, I dunno...publishable?Holy Jughead and all His worshipers, man! I needed to punish myself.
So, shortly after reading the letter, what I did was this:
Grabbed the hair on the back of my head -- a big fistful of it -- then forcefully, and without hesitation whatsoever, smashed my own face into the wall. Twice.
posted by Ms. Lori @ 8:39 PM
3 Comments:
You're just like me. I dont tolerate bullshit either. Great blog you've got here, sista. Keep it up.
Would you like me to come pick you up so we can hunt down their home address and toilet paper their front lawns?
Thanks, Seema, mah sista-friend.
Gary, you're soooo wonderful.
Keef, answer my damn e-mail
Jeni, YES. Then we'll get drunk and make prank phone calls to our mothers.
Peter, my love, you're my guy. It wasn't a form rejection, it was personal -- and they were 100% correct in rejecting that story. It blows. I wrote the fucker in one mad week last June after having suffered months of writer's ennui, and at the time, I thought it was close to a masterpiece. However, after revisiting said masterpiece months down the line (I submitted it to the publication in June -- yes, it took almost eight months to get a response), I realized that it sucked donkey wiener.
Lesson for all of you new writers out there -- DO NOT SUBMIT WORK UNTIL IT HAS BAKED TO A BROWN, DELICIOUS CRISP! Raw work will not only sicken the editors, it will give you the runs but good.
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